If anyone exudes the confidence and panache that comes from being comfortable in your own skin, it is Suze Orman. Money and media mogul, she has helped millions of women take control of their finances through her bestselling books, magazine articles, and television specials. Believing “People First, Then Money, Then Things” she was one of the first financial folks to delve into the emotional reasons behind why people spend long before “emotional spending” became the media buzzword of the day. All that, and now, the New York Times reports that Suze has finally spilled the beans and reveals that her life partner is Kathy Travis. In true Suze fashion she jests in the article “We’re going on seven years. I have never been with a man in my whole life. I’m still a 55-year-old virgin.”

Back when I was in my 20’s and still relatively clueless about having to run a household with my own money, I discovered her book “9 Steps to Financial Freedom” and “The Courage to Be Rich”. While I was fairly good with my money it was a fine wakeup call to totally nix whatever small amounts of debt I had. It also opened my eyes Read the rest of this entry »

Yet another great connection I made as a result of reading and contributing to Queercents has been finding Donna Mete. When Nina interviewed her a while back I noticed in her bio that she had trained with Debbie Ford. Thus, an instant connection was born. I recently had a chance to connect with Donna by phone and then do this e-mail interview. This woman is up to great things, so read on….

1) What was your inspiration to start A Lesbian’s Life?

A Lesbian’s Life was inspired as a result of an unusual experience I had one night a little more than a year ago. That experience changed me and I have not been the same person since. It was made clear to me that I was to provide a place for women to be seen, to find their voice and power and to take back mine. It was also made clear that I should never let another woman be alone in her experience and that through my book, website and show ideas, I would have a platform to help them be visible and proud. That’s been my mission ever since.

2) I see you have books and television projects in the works. Tell us a little more about them and what you hope the impact of them will be. Read the rest of this entry »

Whether in business or at home, things tend to ebb and flow. And when everything starts stacking up, if you’re anything like me, you’re likely to bite off more than you can chew and overcommit in an attempt to get it all done. Truth be told, you just can’t be all things to all people so don’t even try!

At the moment I seem to have an overabundance of things happening on multiple fronts. While I value being responsive, I often have to remind myself that if I don’t respond to someone the instant I get their e-mail or voicemail, all will still be OK. While I’m not saying the answer is blowing people off, sometimes there is just so much you can stuff into one evening. Waiting until tomorrow unless it is life or death (and in my book I mean REALLY life (breathing? pulse?) or death (not breathing, no pulse, bleeding profusely), is a viable option. Fortunately, I don’t work in an emergency services arena so next to nothing I do is life or death. That means I can cut myself some slack. That probably means you can cut yourself some slack too.

I was surfing around to see what other people’s take was on this same topic. I was happy to see that The Savvy Entrepreneur offers some good business related advice in “Are You Biting Off More Than You Can Chew?”. The same truth that you can’t be everything to everyone holds true for your career as well. Whether you are self-employed or living in the corporate halls, this means you. Read the rest of this entry »

We often feel great fear and get woefully uncomfortable in our own skin when faced with the task of speaking our own truth. Whether it is coming out or letting our personal beliefs known, it can be frightening to be that vulnerable. What if people hate me? What if it makes my whole career crash and burn?

Two recent news stories reminded me that even if the worse outcome happens, it is still for the best. In the end your integrity and truth matter far more than any one job, relationship, or the court of public opinion. And, she who has the courage to stand up for her truth in the face of adversity will ultimately win out even if it takes a little longer than we might like.

Last night, the Dixie Chicks won five Grammy awards essentially showing the world that speaking your truth, even if unpopular, doesn’t have to be a negative thing. Four years ago they ignited major controversy (not to mention death threats, radio boycotts, and concert bans) when they spoke their minds on the topic of President Bush and the Iraq war. While you may or may not agree with their opinions, the fact is, many people fought and died for our rights as Americans to speak our truth. Why then, do we tend to crucify people when they speak up? Their song “Not Ready to Make Nice” is an unapologetic anthem to their right to speak their truth and with five Grammy awards including best album for “Taking the Long Way Home”, I’m certain they now not only feel good for standing up for their own integrity but also for this outside validation of their courage.

In the latest issue of W Magazine, Ellen Degeneres appears on the cover. In the online interview she talks about her lowest lows following the backlash of her coming out on the Ellen show. Personally and professionally she took a bit hit and hit bottom. Yet, never once did she regret having come out. In fact, she considers the whole ordeal a blessing “Because I got to learn that I was strong enough to start over again.” Of course, now Ellen is on top of the world with her talk show and hosting the Oscars. It proves that speaking your truth pays off in the end because not only do you get to stay in integrity with yourself but you ultimately show up in your career and personal life from a much more couragous and authentic space. That in and of itself is part of what success is really about.

How about you? Are you living and speaking your truth?

It seems we’re often too busy doing stuff to stop and celebrate the good stuff — both big and small. Really celebrating seems to be reserved for things like birthdays, holidays, weddings, and other life milestones. And, oftentimes for the LGBT crowd we don’t get to celebrate fully because the world doesn’t recognize our families the same way. Sometimes we don’t even know what to measure or celebrate ourselves. Or, we tend to hide a little bit because being more open or out makes us uncomfortable. I say celebrate anyway….the big stuff and the little stuff.

Today is what Kim & I recognize as our 15th anniversary as a couple. So, I have celebrating on my mind. Even so, there’s the little detail we’ve always struggled with in terms of “what is our actual anniversary date”. We arrived at February 9th because it was the tipping point that took us out of the realm of college friends and into being a couple (even though we didn’t recognize it as such at first…oh the throws of the internal strife of coming out to yourself in the middle of such an experience). There’s a 5 1/2 year gap between this date and when we had a commitment ceremony. So, we actually get to celebrate 2 anniversaries every year. Life is short, why not?! It was simply another milestone along the path and since our relationship isn’t recognized by any antiquated laws, we get to make our own rules. Not to mention all the good and tough times all count! Read the rest of this entry »