At least one major storyline got wrapped up (at least partially) this week with an unexpected twist and turn. While the rest of the ladies were creating tangled relationship plotlines, Tasha and Alice were having some big life defining moments.

Tasha’s trial for conduct unbecoming a soldier started in full force. Everyone dressed to the nines in full military dress uniforms and prosecuting counsel Colonel Davis (played by Kelly McGillis) is loaded for bear. With Alice being called as the prosecutions’ main witness, you just had to know things were going to get intense and a bit out of the tight control of those in command.

First I have to say I just about spit out my tea as I listened closely to the language used as trial was brought into session, specifically “court is not bound by the rules of formal evidence”. Gotta love that. In the military we make our own rules and then make up how we conduct the justice process as well. So much for due process. As the Church Lady on Saturday Night Live used to say “Now, isn’t that CONVENIENT?” All I know is that with each passing episode’s glance behind the military veil I get just that much more compassion for our LGBT brothers and sisters who have served or are serving our country. It is like the additional “something extra” burden all gays and lesbians face in the workplace and society plus a little something more because of the inherent design and infrastructure of the highly hierarchical (and hypocritical) armed services.

From day one we knew something was “off” with Col. Davis. People who are fully comfortable with themselves are just not that uptight and righteous. In this episode we catch her stealing glances at the ladies in the gym and locker room. Straight women just don’t look and linger like that when checking out another woman. And, true to form, Alice catches Davis’ subtle glances. Remember this is the same Alice who taught Dana about gaydar in Season 1.

To cut to the chase, Alice calls Davis on her sexuality while on the stand. Totally blows the place out of the water as she speaks her truth and wonders aloud how you can condemn someone, a decorated and dedicated soldier, for simply having lesbian friends. All hell breaks loose as Davis calls a recess to have her witness “compose herself” and then bargains with Alice. Threatened by her own vulnerability Davis tells Alice to inform Tasha that if she sticks with her “I’ve been setup” story the charges will be dropped. How’s that for an about face? I have to say I was personally surprised by the turn of events. I mean I knew Alice couldn’t sit there and lie, but my what a powerful display of how fear can turn an alpha dog (Davis) into a quick about face. Read the rest of this entry »

Can you answer that question quickly and with a nice long list? If you can’t you’re not alone. So many people really struggle with this question. If I asked you the question “What do you dislike about yourself?” Would the answers flow freely and make a long list? If so, again, you have lots of company.

What got me thinking about this topic again was our monthly full moon gathering. We each were asked to bring to the circle a list of 2-3 things we love about ourselves and 1-2 qualities we would really like to focus on shifting for the better (aka things we don’t like as much or wish we were better at). When we met, we each got to share and talk about our list and light a candle to hold these intentions.

Once again I got to experience firsthand the power of watching wonderful people struggle so much to acknowledge things they love about themselves while quickly jumping right to the “don’t like/need to improve” list. I have seen it so many times — as a participant and assistant at Debbie Ford’s Shadow Process, in my clients, my friends, and definitely myself.

What fascinates me is how when one person speaks in the group and struggles with finding qualities she loves about herself, the others present can so quickly name those qualities. “You are compassionate! You are a passionate woman! You are so giving and charitable! You are creative and talented! You are loving!” The positive qualities just flow effortlessly from the group. Yet, the minute the question gets turned back on us, we freeze like deer in the headlights, mutter a bit, turn our gaze downward, and say “um, hmmm, I don’t know”.

Read the rest of “What Do You Love About Yourself?” at my articles archive…

As we roll into the second half of the 5th Season of The L Word the plots and dramatic twists are being woven into a complex web that is bound to have a few surprises, I can just feel it. This week took us behind the scenes of Lez Girls and deep into the paradox of the military code of conduct as Tasha’s prosecutor arrived on the scene.

I never thought I’d say this, but this week I want to talk about Jenny who I’ve decided is showing up in her most authentic fashion (even if it is entirely over the top and bizarre in many ways). While I’ve never been a big Jenny fan, I have to say that of all the characters on the show she has consistently and unapologetically shown up as who she really is at all times. Even when that seems to change radically from day to day or year to year. She’s had more than her share of struggles and odd story lines, but through it all, at any given moment she is who she is, no questions asked. Read the rest of this entry »

Last week as part of the double dog dares that are going on at Good Morning America, Robin Roberts took the plunge and walked the runway during an Isaac Mizrahi fashion show in New York City. Now for anyone who has followed Robin Roberts since her days at ESPN (and lord don’t I miss her doing the women’s hoops!), you’d know that she isn’t exactly someone who you’d expect doing the runway or modeling fashion. While she is most certainly a beautiful woman, I just never pegged her as the model type.

She made good on the dare alright and she made a statement for all the world. She not only walked the runway in a stunning red gown, but she did so without her wig. That’s right, she walked the catwalk fully bald. You can check out the Celebrity TV version of the moment on YouTube. It was a breathtaking moment to see this amazing woman really tap into her vulnerability and make a statement for all who have ever or will ever battle (breast) cancer. “This is who I am and I embrace it” said Robin as she commented on why she chose to do the walk without her wig.

As I watched her debut I just cheered and cheered. Now THAT is what it means to be comfortable in your own skin. To embrace fully who you are at any moment and show up 110%. That makes Robin and all the other women in the world who do just that every day an inspiration and our own everyday heroes.

Note: You can check out photos, videos, and Robin’s road to the catwalk at ABC News.

Another week of drama for the ladies of The L Word this time as the bitter battle between SheBar and the clan heats up and Lez Girls starts shooting. For me the best part of this whole episode was seeing Bette and Tina together again. All I can say is that I concur with Bette. When it comes to chemistry “it can’t compare”. Like the rest of the world, I’ll be curious to see how this shakes down.

What struck me most about the episode and what I wanted to explore more are the topics of appearances masking what’s really going on and how acting in spiteful ways serves no one. With the exception of this whole sleeping around problem, Shane has a pretty rock solid character about her. If it weren’t for her clear challenges with leaving trails of heartbreak everywhere, I’d give her an award for integrity. She is always there for a friend in need and truly does take responsibility for her actions. (too bad she doesn’t learn and evolve after she takes responsibility for the messes she makes with women) She has a knack for seeing people for who they truly are and stands by them. This episode is no different. She owns up to her mistakes with the babes in charge of SheBar and makes a face to face visit to try and make amends. Shane begs forgiveness and asks that they keep their retaliation directed only at her and not at her friends who are innocent bystanders. Unfortunately Dawn Denbo and her Buff Barbie Babe (Cindi) don’t have an ounce of integrity between them. Read the rest of this entry »